Starting over

I’m not big on change. The familiar, tried-and-true is much more comfortable. So these past few days on WordPress have been a little unsettling. It doesn’t “feel” cozy like it did on Blogspot. The posts seem like they’re shouting because the photos and words are so large. I don’t like shouting, especially at six a.m.

Even though it’s only been three days, I feel like packing it in and going back to blogger with my tail between my legs, admitting that I don’t like it out in the big blogosphere, returning home to where it’s safe and comfortable.

The other option is to pay for hosting to customize the WordPress blog to look, and more importantly, to “feel” more like home. I believe that’s what God is leading me to do. Which brings up the next issue–what to name it? I’ve got “7degreesOfMe” absolutely everywhere. I started with that name when my first husband was diagnosed with cancer. It was a place to talk about what I was going through as a wife, mother, daughter, caretaker, office manager, furbaby mom, and student (I went back to school for the umpteenth time). Since then, it’s evolved to what it is now, and the name doesn’t seem to fit, but it’s my handle everywhere.

I’m having to/needing to grow my platform to find a literary agent, so starting over again with a new handle seems daunting even though my number of followers is comparatively small. On some sites, I’m Shari Young; on others, I’m Beeda Speis (my pen name). It’s just really a mess. I do have a name that God has given me to use, “Draw Near to God.” It goes with the direction of the ministry that God is developing for me. It’s God-honoring. It says where my heart is. And, “draw” goes with my day job since I draw buildings for a living. (God is so clever!)

So what does this have to do with obedience? A whole lot! God has just really laid on my heart that I need to focus on this ministry of helping people develop a deeper relationship with Him. The focus is on our Heavenly Father, and a name that has the word “me” in it does not fit the bill. That means starting over again with a new God-centered “brand.”

He’s also teaching me how to be more obedient by creating a need to wait on Him. He answers my prayers in His perfect timing, but I get impatient and make decisions separate from His desires for me. It constantly costs me time, anxiety, and sometimes even money. My goal is to rest on Him for all things, all decisions, all needs.

I so appreciate you! You’ve followed me through so much. You’ve lifted me up, prayed for me, and with me. You’ve supported my ramblings and musings with kindness and encouragement. Words just can’t express how much it means that you’re on this journey with me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Whatever name or handle I end up using, I’ll leave bread crumbs so that you can find me. I need you to come along with me. Change is scary, but it will be a lot easier if I know that you’re still there.

But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. James 1:22 ESV

Please join me this week in praying for obedient hearts and minds. Let’s pray that God speaks clearly to us that we may discern His voice and His will for us. Pray that we seek to be obedient every single day. Ask Him to guide us to do His will and help us grow to become more Christlike in our daily walk.

Update:

I checked and there is a ministry with a very similar name, so now I’m really confused. Please pray for God to give me a clear direction.